PDA

View Full Version : Neo Xzhan's poetry



Neo Xzhan
10-15-2002, 06:35 AM
Here I am standing in the rain.
Trying to get rid of al my pain.
Trying to be normal, trying to be plain.
But sometimes it feels all is invain.

Here I am standing still.
No one is making me, free of will.
My life seems empty, there is no thrill.
There is a void which I cannot fill.

I scream with a my might.
In the darkest deepest night.
Because my feelings, they feel not right.
I am in confict but I will not fight.

It feels like my heart is on fire.
Inside me screams my deepest desire.
To me it is very dire.
But I am exhausted, I will tire.

All words will come and go.
They all just go with the flow.
They are there and that what they show.
That is all I need to know.

Neo Xzhan
10-16-2002, 03:26 AM
I was hoping someone would have posted by now but I really gotta write this down.

I will be your light
In your darkest night
I will give you the strenght to fight
I know you will make it right

You will open up your mind
You will allow me to find
You are honest, you are so kind
You have shown me true loves makes blind

We will go to a place far away
A place where no one will hear us say
A place which is beautiful every day
And there is where we will forever stay

But sometimes I feel
Like all of this is not real
It becomes hard for me to deal
With that what lies beyond the seal

But I am not afraid
Because I know you will wait
And even though you maybe late
It is not our choise, but choosen by fate

The Wandering Knight
11-10-2002, 07:06 AM
Good work New Xzahn....keep it up;)

Neo Xzhan
11-11-2002, 11:34 AM
Oooooh somebody posted o_O. Thank you Wandering Knight ^_^. and here is a new poem.

Sometimes I dont know
Where I am from, where to go
There is a great emptyness inside
And so many who have died

What is this emptyness I am feeling
It feels like my heart is bleeding
Why am I enduring such pain
so much lost without anything gain

There has been caused so much grief
That I am almost afraid to believe
I just cant understand
Why things had to happen the way they went

I know I am rather shy
That is why I know why
To me it may sound strange
But I really want to change

I long for the day
That I will find my way
From now on I can dream
And I am leaving to places never seen

The Wandering Knight
11-11-2002, 04:10 PM
Hey you don't need to thank me..it's great that's why I replied...
This one's nice too..It kinda explains what I feel sometimes:)
keep up the good work:D

Neo Xzhan
11-12-2002, 04:12 PM
<center>I dont expect you to like me
I dont expect you to love me
I dont expect you to comfort me
I dont expect you to heal me
All I want you is to listen

I dont want to be someone I am not
The way you look at me is unfair
Never have you tried to understand me
Maybe you are afraid to see what is underneath
But dont worry to much for what I am about to show

I am just like everyone else
Why do you look at me differently
Is it something that has happend long ago
I would like you to take a moment to rethink your ways
For what makes me different from you

There is no fear in opening your heart
For in doing so you will show your strenght
You dont need to fear you own errors
You are not afraid to see that you were wrong
When you cast your fears aside you will understand

Finally you have seen who I am
You settled with the truth
There was nothing to be afraid of after all
You have opened your eyes and heart
And you have found in me a new friend.</center>

The Wandering Knight
11-12-2002, 04:35 PM
Nice one Xzhan....But I like the one before..Maybe because it described what happened to me once:D

And hey people....Come on...POST SOMETHING

Autumn
11-13-2002, 02:12 PM
Oh, NX's your poems rhymed really well even still managing to have lots of emotion and interesting words in between. Also, I can relate to some of the themes in your poems so it made me like them even better. Great job NX!!

*Claps* I hope other Shriners post up as well cos your poems are truly good and worthy of their time ^_^

Neo Xzhan
11-14-2002, 07:40 AM
Thank you Arwen glad that you like my writing.


<center>If I could cary you
over the deep waters from your strugling and fears
then I would cary you, hours and days long

If I knew the words to awnser your thoushands of questions
about life, about you, about loving and becomming happy,
then I talked to you, hours and days long

If I could grow peace in your heart by patiently
waiting and hoping till the seeds of peace would
open up in you then I waited, hours and days long

If I could heal that what is going on in your heart
Impotence, unhappyness and tears that havent been freed
then I would stand next to you, hours and days long

But I am not bigger, not stronger then you
and I dont know everything and I cant do as much...
I am just a friend on your path, for hours and days long</center>

Autumn
11-14-2002, 01:05 PM
Oh, I like that poem as well cos it has a romantic and perky theme to it, the playing around with words is good and there's lots of emotion. But I found with this poem unlike the rest is that it lacks that rhyming techinique which made me like the poems in the first place and there are a few spelling mistakes here and there. Don't worry though NX as it's still very good.

*Claps* ^_^

Neo Xzhan
11-14-2002, 02:00 PM
I like writing with and without rhyming so I can express my feelings better, also sometimes its kinda hard to rhyme without messing everything up. But anyways thc for the support.

The Wandering Knight
11-14-2002, 03:21 PM
Good work NX...even though there's no rythm in your last..It's still good as it expresses your feelings...it's good..no it's great...

Keep up the good work...I'll make sure that I keep checking to see what you write..:D

see ya..

Autumn
11-15-2002, 01:26 AM
Originally posted by Neo Xzhan
I like writing with and without rhyming so I can express my feelings better, also sometimes its kinda hard to rhyme without messing everything up. But anyways thc for the support.

Yeah, I find that is the case when I write poetry so I tend NOT to rhyme at all in my poems but my poems suck so I won't show you them. Yup, I know rhyming in a poem is a bit weird but a poem doesn't HAVE to rhyme. People just think that cos their ignorant as hell.

But don't worry NX... Not rhyming in a poem is fine with me just as long as it's good. NX, your poems are good without the need to rhyme so it's all good ^_______^

Zachron
11-15-2002, 04:50 PM
You don't really have to have rhyme or rythm for it to be a good poem. Some times it's just the words that make a poem.

I found your first two interesting. They seem to compliment one another. The first one voices an immense, unfulfilled need, while the second one voices a need to fulfill an immense, unfulfilled need. The third one, made me think of war. Not so much the 'so many' have died part, so much as the 'I can't understand how things went the way they went' part and the 'so little gained' part. I'm not really sure why I thought of war. Maybe it's because, in the human brain, sex is linked to agression, or maybe not. hmm... i dunno.

Now the final poem, to me had the best message. 'I may just be there, but I'm there for you' is a very pleasant, heartwarming message. It could've been a better poem, but it was still pretty nice.

P.S. Jello!

Neo Xzhan
11-15-2002, 05:09 PM
I cant help the way I feel
sometimes I wish all this wasnt real
To live in a dream and sleep forever
It does sound as if it were better

I wish I could all this undone
But you are already gone
Now I am all alone
Searching, trying to find a new home

I wish you were here by my side
And the you would take the lead, you will guide
You would just get us lost
But together we could survive any frost

I wish I could talk to you somehow
I still have so much to say, even now
After so many countless days
I want to look in your eyes and just gaze

I wish I could turn back time
Then you would be still mine
And all my thoughts wander away
And I am alone here to stay

Zachron
11-15-2002, 08:31 PM
Is the love dead, or just broken up? You don't know, and to the eyes of this one, the love may as well be dead. Wishing for your lost lover does you little good, but we all do so anyway.

All love is really unrequited.

Autumn
11-15-2002, 11:49 PM
Oh, I like your latest poem as it has feelings and emotions that I have felt just recently. Though it isn't as good as your earlier poems it's still good. *Claps* ^_^

Neo Xzhan
11-18-2002, 01:08 PM
Thx alot for the support guys and I really hope other people will be posting here soon. In the meanwhile, here's my latest poem.

You turned your back on me when I needed you
You refused to let me pass through
You picked me up and threw me away
I doesnt seem to matter what I say

Now you refuse to see me
I can hardly believe that this is the way you want it to be
How can you live your live like this
There are so much problems, there is so much amiss

Why do you pretend you arent there
You must have such a heavy burden to bare
No one can face their problems alone
And I'll be waiting for the day when you come home

You have changed so much that it is hard to believe
I cannot accept you cause yourself so much grief
Why wont you let some one near
There is nothing about it to fear

Why dont you seek the help of a friend
There already is so much time spend
Remember that the road to a friends home is never long
But all I hope is, that you have the strenght to go on

The Wandering Knight
11-18-2002, 09:52 PM
This one's good too...I don't have any comments since i'm light headed and all...Keep up the good work...

Autumn
11-19-2002, 01:49 AM
Oh, I like that poem was well even if it didn't rhymed. It had good rhyming and NX, you played around with the words in that poem extremely well. Congrats!!

*Claps* ^______________^

Neo Xzhan
11-20-2002, 03:24 PM
A[Only registered and activated users can see links] cmon I want other ppl posting here :P. And I just finished a new poem.

<center>Here I am crying
And you don't even care
It doesnt matter to you

Slowly I am dieing
Only because your were never there
It doesnt make any difference what I do

In my time of need
You turn your back and look away
And you ignore all my cries

All I ask of you is one simple deed
All I want is to hear you say
But everything I say just flies

You are close yet so far
Why are you being so distant
Why won't you lend me your ear

You made in my mind a scar
I cannot believe you are so ignorant
Take some time to listen and hear

I feel us growing apart from eachother
And I am in my own sorrow bathing
Now I am locked up never to be free

I keep screaming out
But my voice sounds to weak
All this time you haven't replied

For me this is the final bout
I have reached my last peak
And so it ends, for I have died</center>

Autumn
11-21-2002, 01:12 PM
Heh, that's pretty good. Maybe even my fave poem out of all your poems. It's easy to relate to, it's emotionable and even though it doesn't rhyme too much you definitely shows that you know how to play around with words NX.

Great job! *Gives NX a cookie* ^_____^

Neo Xzhan
11-25-2002, 03:38 PM
I had alot of mixed emotions lately and I wanted to make a poem on that but it was kinda hard but here it is.

<center>In the darkest night there is a ray of hope
I'll wander off everywhere my heart takes me
I am searching for awnsers hoping to find
Nobody could give me for i't is for me to discover
And thus I leave hoping to find what I seek

No one can tell me who I am
And sometimes I even doubt myself
When I feel myself fading
I know that you are always there for me
Your strenght is what keeps me going

But life hasnt been easy on you aswell
We both are enduring hard times
I will try always to be there when you need me
I will be your ray of hope
You are my star who shines bright

Where will I go and what will I do
When I am lost my heart will guide me
Strengthened by your love it doesnt matter where I go
There is no wrong or right neither good or bad
Just our emotions gliding on the wind</center>

The Wandering Knight
11-28-2002, 09:42 PM
There's no rhyming at all...but it's all good...I think you were able to explain how you felt...and the idea's gotton to me..It's great..
Keep up the good work...

Deja
11-28-2002, 10:50 PM
wow... I should have looked in here much much sooner.

your poems are wonderful, Xzhan, they are. These last two are, in my opinion, your best, esspecially the last one posted. You know how to reach the point where all your emotions get out, and I feel that writing is a good talent of yous :) great job!!!

Neo Xzhan
11-29-2002, 05:46 PM
Yay If gots a new fan ^_^. Thank you Majestic your comments are apreciated and here is my latest poem.

<center>If I had the strength
Then I would cary you
But I can't, becouse I am to weak

If I had the courage
Then I would fight
But I can't, becouse I am afraid

If I had the wisdom
Then I would talk
But I can't, becouse I don't know the words

If I knew the way
Then I would guide you
But I can't, becouse I am lost

If I had inner light
Then I would shine
But I can't becouse I am clouded in shadows

But you awnsered my call
You were willing to listen
You saw through it all

I gave you all my love
I gave everyhting and more
Not caring about anything else

And you gave me your love
I now have the strenght, the courage and the wisdom
To show you the way

I have become the light
Together nothing can touch us
Only becouse you said...... I love you</center>

Aeris2
11-29-2002, 06:07 PM
Pretty good, pretty good, the only problem I noticed is you express your feelings so plainly, try and be a bit more poetic so the poem flows more, I know it would be fantastic then, but then again, they're great already. Good job ^_^

Autumn
11-30-2002, 08:26 PM
Once again, great job NX! Your poems are easy to bond with and they are full of good emotion. I have noticed you aren't rhyming your poems as much but that's pretty do as if you did I would consider you as weak cos everyone tries to rhyme their poems. It just turns into a huge cliche.

Well, that's all I have to say basically. *Claps and hands NX a cookie* ^_^

Kenji
11-30-2002, 10:07 PM
Wow, the way you express your emotions in your poems is overwhelming. I can cope with your work, I honestly feel the same way. Reading them all put me a melancholy state that put a flash of my own emotions go right through me.

I think I should start writing poetry now, I got a good reason to start after reading your poems...thx

Aeris2
11-30-2002, 10:28 PM
Yeah well, I think if he just made the words a bit more poetic, he would blow every poet out of the water. Those poems shows a lot of talent...I'm sure they can be amazing.

Neo Xzhan
12-03-2002, 05:21 AM
Thx for the great support everyone. And here another poem.


<center>All of the sudden you were gone
But together we had so many things left undone
There are so many things I need you to know
But I don't know in what direction I should go

You always said till tears do us part
But you left, breaking my heart
You didnt even say me goodbye
But I will not allow our love to die

You never gave me the time to think
If only you left me somekind of link
Our hopes our love our dreams
Everything lost forever or so it seems

I wish I knew where you went
We still have so much time to spend
There are some much feelings I need you to see
But know I only wonder why you left me

I dont want you to be sorry
So that neither of us needs to worry
I am searching for you I am
And someday we will be together again</center>

Aeris2
12-03-2002, 11:49 PM
That one's great! The rhyming is a little sketchy, but everything else is flawless. Really good job. ^_^

Neo Xzhan
12-04-2002, 04:25 PM
Thx alot Aeris2 :). And in the meanwhile a new poem.

<center>There is a place that I want you to see
Where we can do anything we want
Where we are completely free

There is a place of peace
Where the tears of those who have been hurt
Are joined together is the most beautifull of seas

There is a place beyond time
Where seconds, minutes and hours have lost their meaning
And where all of our feelings combine

It may sound as if I've lost my mind
But I am perfectly sane
And yet there will be nothing that we need to leave behind

That place is called love
And together we will fly there
......Carried by the wings of a dove</center>

Aeris2
12-04-2002, 07:33 PM
Well, it looks like you tried too hard or didn't try hard enough, in my opinion. It has a lot of potential though, I can see that. I'm not putting it down, it has good meaning, but judging by the other poems you have written, it seems like you can do much better. To put it in five simple words: It's not your best work. You need to try and put a little more feeling & effort in there. It's good though, it really is, better than a lot of other poems here. :)

Autumn
12-05-2002, 01:07 AM
NX, your last poem wasn't as strong as your other ones but it creates a pretty picture and it's a pretty good poem. Once more, good job NX! *Claps* ^_^

Roo_Dekart
12-07-2002, 06:01 PM
okay, i am sure nobody is going to say that it is bad. i am not saying it, but nobody would do that unless they want to get banned or something. the poem is really good, but i don't really have a good judgement on poetry.

Autumn
12-07-2002, 11:32 PM
Are you saying NX's poems are bad Roo_Dekart? Cos that is pretty rude =P

Roo_Dekart
12-08-2002, 08:56 AM
i just said in the post, "but i am not saying that," and also said i like it.

Neo Xzhan
12-08-2002, 11:04 AM
Originally posted by Roo_Dekart
okay, i am sure nobody is going to say that it is bad. i am not saying it, but nobody would do that unless they want to get banned or something. the poem is really good, but i don't really have a good judgement on poetry.

As far as I know no one has ever been banned for dissing poetry. But even so I have never seen anyone dissing someone else's poetry. If you don't like it pm or just keep it to your self.

And what you think about I am not certain about that part.....

Aeris2
12-09-2002, 05:48 AM
Oh brother. lol, isn't that just perfect though? Man, it gets annoying at times. Save it for later Roo, I don't know about you, but I don't like the taste of crap. So save it.

Neo Xzhan
12-11-2002, 04:19 PM
Ah returned after some time.


I write your love in the sand
But it gets washed away
By the sea

I whisper your love to the sky
But it gets blown away
By the wind

I tell everyone
About your love
But the words will be forgotten

But you carved your love in my heart
And there it is to stay
Until tears do us part

Autumn
12-12-2002, 04:03 AM
Heh, NX your last poem was good but a bit too short for my liking. The running of it was very smooth and I liked how theres lots of emotion in the poem. Well done!

*Claps* ^_^

Neo Xzhan
12-14-2002, 10:00 AM
When you look deep inside of me
You will see as if there is someting misplaced
As if I am not who I think I am

When you look deep inside of me
You will see as if there is something missing
The most important part of me is left out

When you look deep inside of me
You will see a dark place
A place where the light cannot reach

When you look deep inside of me
You will see a very shy person
Who is afraid to share his emotios

When you look deep inside of me
You will see my shatered heart
And my soul broken in a milion pieces

Autumn
12-14-2002, 03:22 PM
Heh, that's a great poem. I feel like I know you slightly better. The poem is good the way it's full of emotion and mystery. Keep it up! ^_^

Neo Xzhan
12-24-2002, 05:44 PM
What kind of father are you
You turned your back on me when I needed you the most
Closed the door when I knocked for help

I feel like I was mistaken
I believed that you were someone you are not
I was hoping that things would turn out right

Now I know I was wrong

You always hurted me
You never apologized for your wrong doings
Why are you like this

You wont want to see me again
You deny my exictanse
But its if far worse then death to be forgotten

May your own sorrow be your undoing

I hate you for who you are
Even know you refuse to see what you did
Almost as if you enjoy watching me suffer

For the longest time I refused to believe this
How can anybody like this
You have killed your feelings for your own son

You would chose solitude over love

You dont want to see what you have done to me
You will ignore the hurt you caused
Only becouse you refuse to see how wrong you were

What kind of father are you
You turned your back without looking around
You wouldnt even care if I died

But this is where I draw the line

I am rejecting you as my father

Farewell.......

Deja
12-24-2002, 06:42 PM
your latest poem is sad ;-; I know what tis about since you told me in chat... sowwy dat happened ;-;

but the two before that.... PRETTY!!! ^-^ esspecially the first of the two. I like the thought put into it ^-^ wondeful, neo :D

Autumn
12-25-2002, 02:24 AM
Heh, I have read that poem before Sander at FFD and I would just like to remind you what a great poem it is. Enough said.. *Hugs you and gives you a plushie*

Keep up the good job! I'm looking forward to more good poems from you ^_^

Neo Xzhan
01-04-2003, 06:14 PM
Sorry that it took me a while for posting a new poem. I had alot of thinking to do lately so here is a new one.

I have been doing some thinking
And I am eager to ask
I need to know before I can't stop sinking
Why where you neve up to the task

It didnt seem to matter even if I was sick
You just passed me by
You dropped me like a brick
If it was up to you, you would let me die

You will allow me to break
You never showed that you care
All this time you were playing, all was a fake
You just ignored me as if I wasn't there

Never you have asked me to forgive you
All this hurt and pain
But now I know through and through
It seems for you a pleasure to gain

No matter what I did
You are never happy with what I have done
All you did was just watching
And now you are gone

You left without a word
You didn't even kiss me goodbye
You cleave like a sword
You left me here to die

Deja
01-04-2003, 11:33 PM
That was a good poem :) the rhyming you put in went together well... this particular poem reminds me of some event, tho that event is way in my past now - anyway, great poem! ^-^

Autumn
01-06-2003, 04:47 AM
Yeah, it's a great poem Sander. I know what it's about probably so it's go to see you writing your poems out of personal events that have happened to you. Like Amara Ciel said the rhyming worked well and it's easy to relate to as it's full of emotion.

Yush, keep it up! *Claps* Encore, encore! ^_^

Neo Xzhan
01-15-2003, 08:38 AM
This is the final time
That you entered my life
You took everything that was mine
Nothing left for me to strife

You have taken everything
And you left nothing behind
I am like a bird with a broken wing
Left alone nowhere to find

You took what you never helped me to get
Everything seems so meaningless now
I can't change a thing since you have your sights set
And you will always do somehow

You will never move on
You are stuck on a small piece
You are never gone
You will always lack peace

Once again you ruined my day
Without any remorse
Why won't you just go away
Before you make things even worse

Or maybe I should leave
It is time to leave you behind
This time no more grief
You can look everywhere you want but you'll never find.......

Autumn
01-15-2003, 09:23 PM
Heh, prettiful poem Sander but it's sad as well. That's a good thing mind you though. It's long but it's still interesting ^_^

Keep it up Sander! ^_^

Bahamut ZERO
01-20-2003, 04:02 PM
Sorry Neo, that I did not spot this thread earlier and reply to it (damn me for being lazy and / or ignorant.)

I assure you I've read all your poetry, and I've enjoyed it all. However, there was one poem in particular that I read, and I immediately thought "My word, brilliant, absolutely stunning!" For the purpose of this post, let me repeat it:-


"If I had the strength
Then I would cary you
But I can't, becouse I am to weak

If I had the courage
Then I would fight
But I can't, becouse I am afraid

If I had the wisdom
Then I would talk
But I can't, becouse I don't know the words

If I knew the way
Then I would guide you
But I can't, becouse I am lost

If I had inner light
Then I would shine
But I can't becouse I am clouded in shadows

But you awnsered my call
You were willing to listen
You saw through it all

I gave you all my love
I gave everyhting and more
Not caring about anything else

And you gave me your love
I now have the strenght, the courage and the wisdom
To show you the way

I have become the light
Together nothing can touch us
Only becouse you said...... I love you."

I like this poem, you know why? Because it shows that one person by themself can try to be strong, but normal human emotion gets in the way, and primeval fears come to the top. Then, the partner, the other half was found, and joined together, the two became greater than the sum of their parts. The one who felt weak, afraid, helpless felt strong, proud, able to help due to the love of the other. This is truly powerful and very well written.

Thank you for writing this so I could read it. Keep up the good work.

Neo Xzhan
01-21-2003, 05:41 AM
You still wander in my mind
You found a place which I cannot find
A place to which my eyes are blind
A place which you won't leave behind

Where ever I walk
Tho whoever I talk
I know that you stalk

Each and every day
I know that you are to stay
You won't go away
And all I do is pray

All these things you have done
And still you are not gone
You won't give up till you have won

You have caused so much pain
And to you that is a personal gain
I don't know if I can sustain
And all my efforts were invain

Riana
01-21-2003, 05:47 AM
Wow. That was beeyateefal. A lot going on there. I'm very surprised to see that you could fit so many words to rhyme!

Bahamut ZERO
01-22-2003, 05:10 AM
Agreed, some more strong work from you here Neo. Keep up the writing so I can keep up the reading!

Neo Xzhan
01-22-2003, 07:16 AM
Thanks for all the support and comment everyone, it really means alot to me.

Neo Xzhan
01-26-2003, 07:24 AM
On the brink of a new day
I will wash all my sorrow away
On the beginning of a new dawn
My worries will finally be gone

I am leaving all behind
I am off in a search to find
New horizons which bring new hopes
For the first time I feel as if I am handling the ropes

For once I made my own choise
I can clearly hear my own voice
At last I can do that what I want
Without having you around to rant

With all my wories gone
I can finally do that which I left undone
This is where I will begin
To anwser all the questions within

So here is where I will begin again
And I am looking forward when
I found inner peace
And all pain will cease

Riana
01-26-2003, 07:27 AM
Wow Sander you never cease to amaze me. I liked that, I like it a lot. Keep 'em coming!

Neo Xzhan
01-27-2003, 03:38 PM
This is dedicated for Amelia, for being such a wonderfull friend.


There is more then meets the eye
If you look into my soul
Then you will see that I will never die
And that I finally have become whole

As long as I remain part of you
And my memory lives on
Then it doesnt matter what you do
And that way I will never be gone

For our friendship is true
And as long as we care
Our heavens will be sky blue
And there will be nothing that we wouldn't dare

Together we can do anything
As long as we hold on to eachother
There is nothing that will break our ring
And there is nothing that will bother

For you are a true friend
One who will sit by my side
Which will always lend a helping hand
And who will turn the tide

Bahamut ZERO
01-27-2003, 03:46 PM
That is a really moving poem - really defines the feel of a close friendship. Congratulations once again man. Keep up the good work, I shall keep on reading (even if I don't reply after each poem, I'll still read them.)

Autumn
01-28-2003, 02:51 AM
Sander, I'm sneaking on-line so this just shows you how much I care about answering to your prettiful poems. To keep it short and sweet I thought your poem dedicated to me was worthy (=P) and it really cheered me up seeing as I'm really depressed. As for your other poems they are great and I'm ashamed to say I skipped over them just to read my poem (also because I'm short on time) so I will have to read them later :X

It sure shows that some Shriners definitely know where they are going in life even if life throws them off cross. Keep up the amazing work Sander because you know I really enjoy reading them. Also, Sezi and Adam (you know who you are) thankies for commenting on Sander's poems because I know it really means a lot to him ^_^

*Glomps Riana and Bahamut_ZERO* =D

Neo Xzhan
02-05-2003, 07:58 AM
This is dedicated to the people who helped me out, I think you know who you are.


I am loosing it again
Loosing faith
Loosing control
Loosing my mind...

My memories haunt me
My emotions hurt me
My feelings betray me

My heart is broken
My mind is shatered
My soul is lost

But you are always there
Always ready for me
Always willing to help

You help me regain control
You give me faith
And the hope I need

Riana
02-05-2003, 08:15 AM
*Gets her hankie*

OMG I've never cried for a poem before...

That really touched me. Be proud Sander, be very proud. You are extremely talented. That is from the bottom of my heart.

*Huggles Sander*

As for the poem for Amelia I love that a lot. Being a person who is in love with literature I found that thoroughly enjoyable.

We love you Sander!!

Autumn
02-05-2003, 01:26 PM
Great poem Sander~ It's so heartfelt and real. It's a job well done ^_^

Neo Xzhan
02-07-2003, 06:41 PM
I wish I could turn around and walk away
There is no reason for me to stay
I don't have anything left to do
I can't seem to help you

I feel so weak, I feel so useless
I am totaly covered by darkness
Everything is just beyond me
Everything just isn't what I want it to be

I cannot make a difference
It doesnt matter if I have my innocence
Nothing I do do seems to matter
And what I do isn't for the better

I am only making things worse
And with everything I do I feel my remorse
And everything I do is simply invain
And my hands are becomming to stain

But why would I keep going on
There is nothing for me to get done
Why would I even care
When there is nothing for me there

This pain is growing strong
I feel this is not where I belong
I will stop to pretend
And I will find the means to get to an end

Autumn
02-07-2003, 06:47 PM
Good poem Sander~ I'm sure a lot of people can relate to it and you write on the matter really well. Keep up the great work! ^_^

*Claps* =D

Bahamut ZERO
02-07-2003, 06:59 PM
Wow, a poem partially dedicated to me (!) That's immediately my favourite for that reason....

That particular poem was strong, as I feel the lost soul in the first part being helped back to the light through the love (let's be blunt) of his friends.

And the second poem, I feel, is the words of someone who has felt pain, and who has begun to take the steps towards dealing with that pain, confronting it. (At least that's the impression I get from the last two lines - I must end this pain by confronting it.)

Good work mate. Keep it up.

Kenji
02-08-2003, 02:04 AM
Haven't read your poetry in a while so I decided to catch up on them.

Once again, I was very impressed. Your poems express lot's of emotions. I really enjoy your work, you even incouraged me to write poetry (honestly). I read some of your first poems and instantly, I felt some kind of connection between me and your work.

I haven't perfected on my work yet, I would rather keep my poem's personal though. If I make any good one's i'll post some up.

Keep up the great work Neo, you deserve a pat on the back for your efforts.

Neo Xzhan
02-10-2003, 03:02 PM
I am tired of all this
Tired of the pain
Tired of the ingnorance
Tired of the rejection

I don't know who I am
I don't know what I am doing here
I don't know where I am here for
I don't know why I am left alone

Why do things happen as they do
Why can't I make a difference
Why does nothing seem to matter
Why am I this weak

I want to end this all
I want to be free of this hurting
I want to leave everything behind
I want to kill these feelings

Nothing seems to matter anymore
Nothing goes as I hoped
Nothing is like it should be
Nothing helps anymore

I am leaving all behind
I am lost in my thoughts
I am hurt beyond pain
I am left alone to die

Bahamut ZERO
02-10-2003, 03:10 PM
The repetition of the beginning part of each sentence added a certain energy to this poem, making it slightly different to ones you've written before, and making a refreshing change of pace. Once again, the emotions of anger and frustration are portrayed strongly through your words.

Nice writing buddy!

Autumn
02-11-2003, 12:40 AM
Beautiful poem Sanderness~ I think this might be one of your best yet because the poem runs together so well and it's full of good emotions. I can relate to it very well and I like it how you always write on personal experiences ^_^

It's very enlightening. Keep up the good work Sander! =D

Kenji
02-11-2003, 09:25 AM
Nicely done, I felt strong emotions from your last one. I can relate to it a lot...Tops the list of best poems i've read.

Your poems are starting to get better...Continue writing beautiful work.

Neo Xzhan
02-12-2003, 08:13 AM
The night is falling down
Covering enerything in shades
The clouds are crying rain
And the stars are slowly dying

As the sun disapears behind the clouds
The shades strech further
Covering everything in darkness
And the clouds continue their weeping

As the last ray of light vanishes
Silhouttes dance in the distance
Spritits gliding past
And lives are lost

The pain inside is growing strong
The scars uncover themselves
An emptyness deep inside
A heart that is dying

And as the night draws closer
And even the moon is covered in darkness
Everything is lost
All hope is gone

The cold freezes everything
Memories float around
And get frozen by the wind
And nobody remembers

Feelings that are lost
Emotions have been forgotten
Meaningless words
Eyes who stare

And so everything becomes black
Covered in an eternal night
Where nothing matters
The place where I have left life

Autumn
02-13-2003, 10:12 PM
Sad but yet prettiful poem Sander~ Not as personal as the others but in a way it is. I really like the way the poem paints a realistic picture in my head ^_^

Keep up the great work Sander!

Kenji
02-17-2003, 04:13 PM
Another great poem.

Your poem had strong imagery. I can almost paint a picture with the poem you gave.

Keep up the work.

Riana
02-17-2003, 04:36 PM
Sorry 'bout not posting recently ;-; I loved those last three you wrote. Why don't you share your poems with the world? Write a book!!! Go for it! I'd be your first customer ;) (If that were possible). Honestly Sander I feel these are good enough for literature lessons.

Young Country Gurl 2004
02-17-2003, 11:01 PM
Wow, you write really good poems.. If I had written any good ones lately, I'd post them... Actually, I probably wouldn't, I'm shy about sharing my writing.

Neo Xzhan
02-21-2003, 04:48 PM
What if it all ended here
Would you be there
Don't be afraid there is nothing to fear
But why would you even care

To you I am nothing
Why do you look at me this way
Why is this all so bothering
Why do you keep walking away

Are you afraid to face me
What ever did I do wrong
Stop looking away and see
And admit what you have done

Is that really to much to ask for
Just to appologize for what you did
Just open up the door
So that I can find a place to make it fit

Autumn
02-21-2003, 04:56 PM
Great poem Sander~ It really makes you think about life because it's so realistic and it fits in with your other poems. Keep up the good work Sander! ^_^

Riana
02-21-2003, 05:29 PM
Wow I like that one too, it reflects an epsiode that ocurred in my life, with those similar feelings...

*huggles Sander*

Don't change Sander dear, don't change.

Mercutio
02-21-2003, 05:41 PM
As always it's great Sander. It's got a strong form to it and the words really flow really well. Good work and keep it going.

Althalus
02-21-2003, 05:57 PM
Awsome poetry, Sander. Very strong and inspiring. Deep in feeling. Those are the best kind.

Kenji
02-23-2003, 02:07 PM
As always, great work.

Your last poem was very deep and engaging. I can almost feel my past thoughts catching up with me.

Your poems are among my favorite's, I got em all printed out to read when i'm feeling gloomy.

Thanks again for another good poem and keep up the good work.

Neo Xzhan
02-25-2003, 03:20 PM
I can't stop crying
Each and every day I keep on dying
Nothing to regain
And inside me growing, pain

Nothing to hold on to
Everything which was told isnt true
My life is based on lies
And you told them as cold as ice

You left me standing outside
For what reason without a fight
You just close the door
And never open up anymore

My sadness overcomes me
Nothing is as I wanted it to be
And here I am in sorrow
Wishing there was no tomorrow

Bahamut ZERO
02-25-2003, 05:29 PM
Your work, as always, continues to impress me with its emotional power. Your feelings are laid bare and raw, for everyone to see, and those emotions define a strength in your poetry.

Keep on wriiting buddy, and draw strength from your talent.

Autumn
02-25-2003, 11:03 PM
Really good poem Sander. Ack, I'm running out of worthy things to say. All I can say is that I can relate to that poem very well and it's full of good poetic emotions.

Note to self: Print Sander's poems..

Kenji
02-28-2003, 04:01 AM
Another great addition to your growing list of poems.

So much emotion from that one. I really enjoyed reading the end. I ever read it over a few times in my mind to ease my own pain.

Hope you continue to write more, your skills are definataly increasing dramatically.

Neo Xzhan
03-06-2003, 04:10 PM
I am tired of all this pain
Brought so unwillingly bring upon me
I am tired of the sleepless nights
When my memories keep haunting me

I am tired of being alone
Now where to find a friend
I am tired of nowhere to call home
Wandering about never to find anything

I am tired of being abused
And I wonder why this seems so normal
I am tired of being sick all the time
A sickness no one has a cure for

I am tired of being stared at
All these eyes cutting me away
I am tired of being unaccepted
What makes me so different

I am tired of all this hurt
So voilently forced upon me
I am tired of life
Something I never asked for

Autumn
03-06-2003, 09:41 PM
Great poem Sander. Very realistic and emotional in all the right places. Never stop writing..

Kenji
03-06-2003, 11:34 PM
Ah what a beautiful poem.

I can relate to this so I really enjoyed it. It gave me something to think about that's for sure. As you continue to write, you skill seem to improve greatly.

Keep up the outstanding work!

Neo Xzhan
03-11-2003, 12:07 PM
When I look into the mirror
It is not me I behold in it's reflection
And even when you draw nearer
All I see in your eyes is neglection

When I touch my skin
I doesn't feel asif it is real
The only thing I feel is the pain within
Everything hurts what you make me feel

I can't even taste the air
Because you corrupted it
And I've learned that you will never be there
You placed me somewhere you wouldn't want me to fit

I cannot go to sleep
Because even there you are waiting
All there is left for me is to weep
And here I am slowly fading

Bahamut ZERO
03-11-2003, 02:07 PM
That last poem is one of the better ones you've done Sander. The emotion comes across strongly in it, the sense of hopelessness at being able to escape the grasp of the person who holds you in their sway. I applaud it. It's great stuff.

Autumn
03-11-2003, 09:24 PM
Great poem Sander. It's very realistic and it's clear that you put a lot of work into the poem because it's quite personal but that goes for all your poems. Keep on writing..

Kenji
03-11-2003, 10:28 PM
What a inspiring poet you are becoming.

I really loved the picture this poem gave me. It was a very strong poem filled with very sad emotions. This poem seemed a lot better that your previous one's which only means you are getting much better at writing.

Don't give up writing poetry, you have unlimited potential.

Neo Xzhan
03-15-2003, 03:32 PM
When will someone tell me where I belong
Why wont anybody tell me where I should do
I am to weak to stand on my own
I keep on falling and have nothing to grab onto

Please wake me up from this dream
Show me the truth just this one time
Everything is a lie, anyway it may seem
So that once I may find what is behind

I don't know what I should believe
I don't know who to trust
Everything I saw everything is just to decieve
Everything you did only to satosfy your own lust

Why wont you just elave me alone
So I get a chance to find out
And finally find my way home
Which I am sure to find without a doubt

Autumn
03-15-2003, 05:45 PM
As always, good poem Sander. Words can't describe how good it is apart from good, of course. Keep up the great work..

Kenji
03-15-2003, 08:25 PM
Ah another great poem to add to the list.

What a amazing piece of work written by one of my favourite poet's on the shrine. You work is getting better, congrats. You work never ceases to amaze me...never give up writing plz.

I really enjoyed this part...

And finally find my way home
Which I am sure to find without a doubt

I had to read it over a few times because it was so great.

Keep up the great work!

:)

Neo Xzhan
03-20-2003, 12:43 PM
I am running away
For I don't wish to stay
I want to leave everyting behind
In the hope that someday I will find

Looking for a place I belong
And I am for always gone
Going somewhere I'll never return from
And I'll never fisnish what I left undone

Trying to escape the pain
I long wish to be drained
Long longer to be caged
Already I am too much aged

I want to do this for me
So that one day I may be free
So forgive me if I do
But I have to leave you

Autumn
03-21-2003, 05:53 AM
Good poem Sander. It somehow lacks the aura your other poems possessed but it still makes for a great read. Well done..

Neo Xzhan
03-24-2003, 01:25 PM
Crying on the inside
My tears are stuck in my eyes
Tired of this endless fight
And sick of your tiresome lies

Why won't you admit you are wrong
Take a moment to look back
And see all the harm you have done
But eventually it will cost your neck

I wish to be left alone
No more pain from you
There isn't even a reason to phone
Because I know what you are going to do

Never again I want this to happen
This tense feeling
It only causes me to sadden
And even now, my heart is bleeding

I am in terrible pain
And yet you turn your head
I don't know how much longer I can sustain
And you wouldn't care when I would be dead

Autumn
03-24-2003, 11:52 PM
Great poem Sander, despise it's dark theme. I know where you got your inspiration from and since the poem is of personal value to you it has even more importance. I can actually relate to it well now and then and I definitely enjoyed reading this poem.

Kenji
03-31-2003, 11:58 AM
I was away for a while and now I finally get to catch up on Neo's poetry. Well, I can tell you...I wasn't dissapointed.

Your latest poem is so good I seriously re-read it a few times. I can relate to it a lot, espiecally when I was a kid.

Anyways, It was good to read more great poetry by you...Never stop writing.

Neo Xzhan
04-06-2003, 04:09 PM
Every day I die a little more
But you turn your head away
Ever since you closed the door
And you feel there is nothing more to say

My pain is increasing
And you close your eyes
The hurt is never ceasing
And all you tell me are the same lies

And what if I were gone
Would you even care
There isnt a thing that you have done
And you were never there

And you won't leave me alone
You like seeing me in pain
As if there isnt enough damage done
As long as you can keep playing your game

Autumn
04-06-2003, 10:30 PM
Great poem Sander. As you might know I can relate to that poem so it's good to see you putting my feelings about that situation of mine into words. Well done..

Riana
04-10-2003, 06:02 AM
O_o deary me...I've lost track!

Sorry Sander I haven't read any of your poetry lately...I"ll try harder to keep up.

Now for a comment...The last few poems were very detailed and showed such strong emotions, and that's what I love about your poems. I've said it before and I'll say it again, keep writing Sander, you're very talented indeed.

Neo Xzhan
04-17-2003, 04:34 PM
I am running away
Not knowing where I am going
There is no reason for me to stay
Not caring what I am doing

Just go out of my life
I dont want to see you anymore
Your eyes cut like a knife
This is where I slam the door

Dont come and look for me
Because you will never find
All I want for you is to let me be
But you don't see my pain, you are blind

You look straight throug my heart
Ignoring all my feelings
Everything I had torn apart
And you made my life meaningless

Riana
04-17-2003, 04:49 PM
Great poem Sander very emotional, and strong hearted. Keep up the great work.

Autumn
04-18-2003, 02:27 AM
Great poem Sander. Very dramatic and emotional, as always. Well done..

Kenji
04-18-2003, 11:25 AM
Good stuff Sander.

Your last two poems very emotional and I can relate to them. Your last poem is my new favorite poem. Very strong wording made it more effective.

Hope to see more great work soon!

Neo Xzhan
04-23-2003, 06:14 PM
These wounds will not heal
My heart filled with pain
Everything is so unreal
And all of my tears are lost in the rain

Did you ever think about what you've done
You have torn my life apart
But nothing has changed since you're gone
Beacuse my pain rests in my heart

You took what you never helped me to get
You just picked it up and threw it away
And you did everything without any regret
And you keep up these mind games you play

And still after all this time
You refuse to leave me at ease
I've lost eveything that was mine
All I ever wanted was a little peace

But I am done running from you
I want you to leave me be
I'll end this no matter what you do
Even if it means the end of me

Riana
04-24-2003, 07:45 AM
*wipes the tears from her face*

That was beeyateefal. I for one can most certainly relate to that. Great work Sander. *hugs*

Bahamut ZERO
05-01-2003, 05:07 PM
"I want to do this for me
So that one day I may be free
So forgive me if I do
But I have to leave you"

Words appropriate to me at this moment in time with how I am feeling. Probably in a different context, but still appropriate.

Your poems are always so powerful and moving in emotion, Sander. Although they portray negative emotion a lot, I still find them excellent pieces of writing. Very, very impressive stuff my friend. Keep up the hard work.

RK
05-01-2003, 09:00 PM
I don't really like poetry 'cause I can't understand it. Most poetry is usually dry or without rythm... I like petry with rythm, that's why I like yours, Sander. Most of the poems I have read always is always dark and depressing.. make more happy poems, Sander, I want something new and I know you can do it. Keep on doing what you are most good at ;).

Memento Mori
05-09-2003, 09:53 AM
The rhythm and feelings are well evoked, but, as I was looking through, they all have the same scheme to them... I'd personally like to see something different you know? But these are all well written. Bravo.

Kenji
05-11-2003, 02:08 PM
Haven't been on in while but it's good to see you are still writing =D

As always, i'm impressed again. Your newer material is getting better and better. Very strong and emotional.

Good stuff...Nuff said.

Neo Xzhan
05-16-2003, 04:37 PM
When I look in the mirror
I don't see myself anymore
Just blurred images
Of a person who once was
Memories.....
Pictures.....
Meaningless words

I have nothing left to give
You took everything and more
And now that I've opened my eyes
It doesn't matter anymore
Memories.....
Pictures.....
Meaningless fights

I am broken
No one can fix me
The pieces won't fit together
A shatered soul
Memories.....
Pictures.....
Meaningless life

Khyros
05-16-2003, 04:40 PM
These poems resonate with me, for reasons you probably know well, Sander. I just want you to know you are never alone as long as there are people like me around...

Bahamut ZERO
05-16-2003, 07:45 PM
Dude, that last poem really hit home with me. It was sweet, very good, well written and top notch.

Keep up the good work.

Riana
05-17-2003, 03:59 AM
That was beeyateefal, I can certainly relate to that one too. I liked that one a lot, I personally like poems which don't rhyme so much, they tend to show exactly what you want to express.

That's a bloody good one.

Autumn
05-17-2003, 07:00 AM
Once again great poem Sander. You know what works so keep doing your thing. Well done.

Neo Xzhan
05-20-2003, 10:52 AM
Thanks for the wonderfull support everyone, it means alot to me.

This next poem goes out to alot of people: Amelia, Sezi, Steffi, Nick, Adam, Mandi, Anna and Nymph

If I doubt myself
How can you still trust me
If I don't know if I am lieing
How do you know I tell the truth
If I don't know who I am
How can you recognize me

If I don't know where I am
How can you find me
If I don't know why I am hurting
How can you heal me
If I don't know where to go
How can you guide me

But you are always there for me
You still have faith in me
You'll never doubt me
You'll help me throuhg it
No matter how down I am
You'll always be ray of hope

Bahamut ZERO
05-20-2003, 11:25 AM
The contrast in those last two poems is incredible. One filled to the very bottom of despair, followed by one that fills me with hope. Sander, you know we're here for you if you ever need us, and I greatly appreciate you taking your time out to post this. It's a wonderful piece of work.

Keep on writing. And you'll only get better.

Kitten
05-20-2003, 10:41 PM
<table><tr><td><img src="[Only registered and activated users can see links]"></td><td><font face="verdana" size="-1" color="#05A1CE" valign="top">
That was very dear of you to dedicate that to all of us Sander. I know myself, and I'm sure everyone else appreciates it.

Beatutiful work as always. Thank you and love you!. :)


</td></tr></table>

Riana
05-22-2003, 07:10 AM
Right on Steffi! I especially appreciate all your poems, and it's nice to know that we are in your thoughts Sander. Thank you for that poem, one worth remembering.

Autumn
05-24-2003, 06:53 PM
Very good poem Sander. Like everyone has already said it was sweet of you to think of us when you wrote that poem. Sander, despite your doubts of yourself we all believe in you and we will be here for you when you need us, for sure.

Keep up the great job Sander.

Kenji
05-26-2003, 04:02 PM
long time since I read your poetry...I should come on more often.

Well, I really related to the mirror poem. It used some amazing imagery. I had a picture of myself staring at a person I barely reconized. A really strong poem Sander.

Your latest was also very heartwarming in some weird way. It shows the strength of friendship when you are feeling down. Some friend will never give up on you even when you feel hopeless. Another strong poem.

You are getting much better I can tell. I never felt so much emotion reading those two poems.

Keep up the great work! I'll be sure to stop by if you are still writing ;)

Neo Xzhan
05-27-2003, 05:54 PM
It's good to know that there are people who care, I am unable to express myself in words how to thank each and everyone of you, but you have my eternal gratitude.

~

I never got to talk to you
Because you wouldn't listen
I never got to look at you
Because you turned your head

You left me all alone
Not to care about what you've done
You separated yourself from me
But I learned, I was never part of you

I never could trust you
Because you turned your back
I never could rely on you
Because you were never there

Looking back on all which has happened
It hits me time and again
It will never let me go
Because you have become a part of me

You always were my fear
Because you always had your way with me
You always would put me down
Because you never believed in me

I am all you ever had
You needed me more then I needed you
But now it is too late
And I find myself falling apart once again

Autumn
05-28-2003, 04:42 AM
Another very good poem Sander. I realize that the theme you're writing about is more personal than it might seem so the poem is all that more interesting, heartfelt and well-written. Keep up the great work Sander.

Kenji
05-28-2003, 06:28 PM
Another great poem Sander :)

It seems like a very personal poem like some of your others. I can easily relate to most of your poems because i've had similar experiences in life. Great work.

Keep on writing more great poetry. :D

Neo Xzhan
06-04-2003, 03:43 PM
As I walk in the valey of dreams
The world becomes my illusion
Everything is as I want it to be
And evertyhing is make-believe

As I walk under my imaginary sky
The night slowly falls down
And everything disapears
Until the nothingness is left

I am running away from everything
I don't want to be found
All I want is to be left alone
I lock myself up and throw away the key

I am gone and you won't find me
I'll make sure of that
There is nothing left for me
Everything has become senseless

Autumn
06-05-2003, 01:50 AM
Great poem Sander. I have to say that I liked the different way you used to describe your emotions by painting a picture with the words in the first two paragraphs. Well done.

Neo Xzhan
06-13-2003, 05:12 PM
Let me take you to a place
Somewhere you've never been before
Let me show you what I never wanted you to see
Something I carried with me for so long

Take a good look at me
And remember who I am
Because everything
Is about to change...

Follow me to my valley of darkness
Floating away in my river of sorrow
I watch over my fields of pain
As I wipe away my tears

Here it is where I lock away my thoughts
It is here where I cage my feelings
Where I throw away all my emotions
Where my heart fills with disbelief

When you discover I am not there
You'' realise my life was a lie
I couldn't face the truth myself
Nothing is what I hoped it would be

Eventually I'll loose myself
Unable to find my way out
I am lost forever
Never ending pain

Bahamut ZERO
06-14-2003, 03:17 AM
Been a while since I've posted a reply in here (even though I've been reading each poem as and when I've seen 'em.)

Your work is still of a very high quality my friend. The last poem especially was very good in that it took me on a journey through what you were feeling. A sort of rollercoaster ride, so to speak.

Keep on writing, my friend. And I shall keep on reading.

Riana
06-14-2003, 06:02 AM
Wow Sander, that last poem so hit home. ;-; That was beeyateefal. You know you're talented to touch one's heart, and so you have. Keep at it dear.

Autumn
06-14-2003, 07:28 AM
Nice poem Sander. It's very powerful, emotional and personal. I like those factors in poems.

I also like the way you were able to take the viewer on a little journey through your words. Yeah, it makes for a good read so keep on writing.

Deja
06-17-2003, 02:02 PM
very, very nice Sanda~ :) I love your style of writing, you have good talent that isnt wasted. I've read through the last few pages of poems and each is great ^-^ The last poem posted I really like.. I dunno, it just has that certain thing that makes it different than the others. Good job~

Neo Xzhan
06-18-2003, 01:08 PM
The sun is setting
The skies are changing colours
And the rain slowly falls down

As the moon rises
And the stars start shining
I am suddenly empty

As the darkness grows
And I enter the deep night
I am cold again

A feeling of lonelyness
Images bashing through my head
And the pain grows

So many things
Things which are so normal
Things I never had

Sleepless nights
I keep myself awake
trying to forget my pain

When the first rays of sun hit me
I realise I made it through another nigt
But even if I try I cannot forget

You use my mind as your playground
You'll always get your way
Nothing will keep you from that

I am running away again
I cannot handle this
I cannot stand the sight of you anymore

Riana
06-18-2003, 02:09 PM
Ooo~ I must say I love that one. It gets straight to the point, and there's just so much feeling involved. A good poem there.

Neo Xzhan
06-21-2003, 06:01 PM
Everytime I hear your name
The memories come back again
Everytime you are mentioned
The pain grows inside of me

When I hear you voice
Images are bashing through my head
Whenever I see your face
I run away crying

I drown my sorrow
And with it
I drown myself

Stuck in my past
I am never moving forward
So I will have nothing to remember

Why won't you let me go
Why do you keep hurting me
Why don't you just give me rest
Why won't you stop haunting me

Riana
06-22-2003, 04:08 AM
That my friend, reflects every feeling in my heart. That struck me til the last word. A great poem indeed.

Neo Xzhan
06-27-2003, 04:35 PM
For the last time you have entered my life
For the last time you have hurt me
I am saying my goodbyes

For the last time you will see me
For the last time you will hear of me
I am saying my goodbyes

Never will I have to face you again
Never will you ruin my life again
I am saying my goodbyes

Never will you influence me again
Never will you make up my mind
I am saying my goodbyes

Finally I make my own disicions
Finally I can get on with my life
I am saying my goodbyes....

Autumn
06-27-2003, 10:47 PM
Great bunch of poems Sander. Very strong, very moving. It shows that you have the courage to move on with your life and I'm really proud of you for that.

Keep those poems coming~ me likes

Neo Xzhan
07-06-2003, 05:23 PM
I am killing all my pain inside
Because I don't need you anymore
I am setting my own course from here
And making my own desicions
Because you are no longer part of me

I try to empty my thoughts
Let go of everything inside
But the pain is still strong
And your precense still lingers here
It's not so simple to forget

But I will make my way through
I will show you
That I am stronger than you
That I can survive without you
I will make it for another day

I have nothing left to fear from you
No more sleepless nights
You can't touch me anymore
I will do everything my way
And for the first time, it's my life I am living

Neo Xzhan
07-07-2003, 04:21 PM
It's a shame to see you go
We still had so much to talk about
And so many things left to do

You have left, going far away
Somewhere I cannot follow you
But there is nothing that made you stay

I wish it wouldn't have to be
Things just didn't work out
So you had no choice but to flee

I hope that things will look for you
You deserve to get better
But there is nothing that I can do

May you find your way
I pray for your safety
May we speak another day

Riana
07-08-2003, 05:39 AM
Oh my. Those were beeyateefal. I really hope things have truly worked out for you for good.
I sure wish that was me feeling that way. *sighs*

Autumn
07-11-2003, 08:31 PM
Another set of very good poems Sander. Heartfelt and honest, a good balance. Well done~

Neo Xzhan
07-19-2003, 03:12 PM
Nothing I do seems to matter
I can't seem to make a difference
Why do things turn out the way they do
As I can't make my own desicions

You are so far away
Yet you are closer then you were before
Still beyond my reach
I will always cary you inside of me

Why can't I make things work out
I cannot fullfill my promisses
All I ever wanted was to be with you
But nothing will change that

Because my heart beats only for you
And all my hopes and dreams
Will never die
As long as I have you

One day we will make it all happen
One day our dreams will come true
And everything we worked so hard for
Will be real

Riana
07-19-2003, 03:53 PM
That was a beautiful poem. Very warm, shining through your true feeling. Nice work.

Kitten
07-20-2003, 12:05 PM
Absolutely...........beautiful :)

Neo Xzhan
07-23-2003, 03:37 PM
Wandering alone in the night
I am trying to figure out what is right
And when I remember all you have done
I realize I am happy that you are gone

Trying to figure myself out
My mind is filled with a great doubt
Is it really me I see
Or just someone I want to be

But then you came along
And you showed me where I belong
And showed me what I needed to know
And you held me close just to show

With you I don't need to ask
Being around you I can remove my mask
I have nothing to be afraid off
Just because I have all of your love

Riana
07-23-2003, 04:59 PM
Oh... ;-; That poem makes me wanna say...a[Only registered and activated users can see links]

Beeyateefal~

Neo Xzhan
07-23-2003, 05:02 PM
Hmm I can't seem to stop writing:

As the rain runs over my window
I can't help thinking about you
From the moment we met
Everything changed

All I want is to be with you
To hold you close next to me
You make all the wrong right
And make me forget all my fear

Being with you is all I wish
You make everything perfect
AS long as you are around
There is nothing I can't do

You make me feel alive
I found my place with you
There is nothing that can separate us
For I will always have you in my heart

Riana
07-24-2003, 07:38 AM
Heh, you certainly can't, and that's a good thing! That was such a nice poem. Keep writing my friend.

Autumn
07-28-2003, 12:53 AM
My bad.. I have been neglecting this thread for a while. Anyways, great poems Sander.

You seem to be getting even better all the way along. I like the way your poems are personal, emotional, gripping and heartfelt. It makes for a good read.

Keep on writing~

Neo Xzhan
07-30-2003, 02:21 PM
I've got you under my skin
And no matter how hard I rub
I can't get you out

The memories burning inside of me
The bruises still hurt
The pain will never leave

When I look at my shadow
I realise you walk with me
And I know you never will be gone

As I rest under the setting sun
When the rain slowly falls down
I feel like I am alone

And when I look at myself in a puddle
The blurred image get's me
But it's only showing what it sees

And then the night falls
Stars start to glimmer
And I start wondering

Is there someone watching me
I am really not alone
You are following me all the time

And when I try to sleep
In my dreams you apear
And I can't dream you away

And when I wake up again
From this restless night
The same day repeats itself

Riana
07-30-2003, 02:35 PM
Wow, that one certainly sticks out from the rest. I like this one I really do~

Don't ever stop writing Sander~

Bahamut ZERO
07-31-2003, 02:59 PM
Great stuff Sander. Simply awesome stuff.

Seriously, this is some brilliantly worked stuff, well written, easy to read and to a point.

If you can still write, continue to do so. Because we all enjoy reading what you have to say.

Autumn
08-08-2003, 07:08 AM
I have already read that latest poem before but I will post my opinion on it anyways. It surely is a good poem and it's very powerful. Well done Sander~

Neo Xzhan
08-09-2003, 07:29 PM
I want to love you
I want to hold you
I want to kiss you
I want to hug you

Being with you is all I wish for
When I am with you everything is so perfect
Nothing else seems to matter
Aslong as you have your arms around me

Forget all my troubles
Forget all my pain
Forget all my fears
Forget all my worries

The feeling of comfort you give me
The warmness you give me
And when I wrap you in my arms
Everything is just perfect

Autumn
08-11-2003, 11:57 PM
I have already read that poem before Sander, and in saying that it's pretty good. It would be great if you would write more poems like that. Keep on writing~

Faramir
08-13-2003, 04:39 AM
Wow. That's damn good Sander. Keep it up ^_^

Neo Xzhan
09-20-2003, 05:19 PM
I dedicate this poem to Steffi

You are so close to me
I have you in my heart
But you are so far away
Because I can't touch you

You touched my heart
In an indiscribable way
And though we have eachother
I never had such a hard time

It pains me to see you leave
And I am filled with joy when you return
With you I know where I belong
Without you I am so lost

Close me in your arms
Let me rest my head on your shoulder
You can take away all my pain
And show me you care

Thoug distance is keeping us apart
I realize you are never far away
And though there isn't much I can do now
Then just let me start by saying

I love you

Neo Xzhan
10-06-2003, 12:49 PM
I am crying tonight
Drowning myself in sorrow
I'll leave myself to die without a fight
I don't wish to live for tomorrow

This pain inside won't go away
So many confusing thoughts in my head
Break my chains, I don't wish to stay
Everything becomes so much simpler when you're dead

It is this life I can't undertand
I refuse to go on like this
I don't want to play pretend
But you already knew something was amiss

I don't want to struggle anymore
Stop tormenting me, I've had all I can stand
I cannot escape, you locked my door
I have one simple request, make it all end

Riana
10-12-2003, 10:29 AM
Those are some great poems there Sander. This last one you wrote really made me cry.

Sander you are a terrific poet and I really hope I can read more of your work. Keep it up my dear friend.

Deja
12-09-2003, 10:04 PM
I've always loved your poetry sanda :) Your work has always been very sincere, and I look for that when reading people's writing. I love it, keep it up ^-^ *hug*